Person is Not a Rude Word

       If  you are close to overdosing on mincemeat… let me offer you an alternative all-day, teatime or elevenses treat: the great British flapjack.

Here is my potentially life-enhancing mince-pie-antidote in proem form:

Ode to Flapjacks

English: Lyle’s Golden Syrup in a resealable tin. This image was created by Whitebox, and is licensed under the following license (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Do your flapjacks fail you?
(I know the falldowns.)
Here’s my foolproof recipe:

Melt a generous 5 oz of fat
(margarine or butter pat)
with 3 oz sugar (that’s sweet)
in ample pan over a low heat.

Add 2 tablespoons tops
of sticky stuff and stir in
(black treacle, golden syrup,
marmalade, malt, molasses).

Mix in 8 oz or so of oats,
Plus optional dry items as fit:
(pinches of salt and shakes of
carob, cinnamon, coconut).

Pour into a well-greased tray.
Bake in a moderate oven
‘til golden brown on top, (say
the time it takes to clear up
the messes you’ve made)…

photo courtesy of R&B BW 2012

When cool, then cut.
Made of the right stuff?
Just take the taste test.

The mixture’s too sweet?
You didn’t say ‘No’ enough…
Not got the salt edge you want?
You’ve not shed those tears yet…
Turned out too soft?
You haven’t got your anger out…
Texture a tad brittle?
You haven’t forgiven either…
Not as moist as you’d like?
You did not love as much…

You can quote me if you like:
‘Here’s a recipe to cherish for life!’

© Luc(e) Raesmith